random blogging

brr,i'm freezing to death in my room rite now and this post is quite a random 1.suddenly feel like bloggin after reading one of my friend's blog.man!she sort of let me realised and think back wad have i done and wad i'm gonna achieve in my life,definitely she has achieved something extraordinary and i'm so impressed by her.it made me realised that i had achieved nth much in my life.i wonder will i have such deep determination and get my mind rite and focus on wad i want to achieve in life?Am i ever gonna have the determination and perseverance to go for the extra mile?Am i gonna not try very hard to achieve wad i want in life?Am i gonna get influenced from my friends greatly and distant away from my goals in future?Am i gonna be strong enuff to stand strong and break all the obstacles?ALL this qns will be answered in the future and time will let me noe the answer.i must must must try very hard to resist the temptation like surfing the net and getting distracted from day dreaming.i need to get my mind rite and focus on wad i want.just like the nike quotation"just do it" but definitely it does not applies to nursing.haha!i might just get patients killed and suffer from heavy consequences.
oh well,i'm starting to get sick and tired of my blog skin,gonna get it changed when i'm free.=)anw,i seriously need to lose a large sum of calories!i dun feel good and light and furthermore,i dun look good wearing the desire clothes that i bought.Usually i'll buy the clothes impulsively tho its 1 size smaller,i'll have the mindset that okayy..nvm!i'll lose weight to fit myself into the top.BUT!no use!the motivation and determination doesnt last me for even a month!usually its only a week,and den i get distracted and din bother to lose some weight again!man!i need to change my mentality!
And nowadays i jus feel that i cant click with pple anymore,i dunno wad to talk abt to different individuals anymore.why is that?!and i jus feel like getting home everyday after school,read up on my nursing references and spend my whole day in my room.nowadays i'm like living in a world of my own.Almost every gurl in my clique in poly has a bf and they asked me why i dun hv.my answer will always be i cant commit in a r/s this moment,even if it did,i doubt it will last cuz i'll always prioritize my family first,den my life,my friends and lastly my r/s.thats for now,in future,i'll definitely gonna place my r/s first!!i feel like shit rite now without having any great achievements in life.My brother is a spoiler in my life.He always pull me down in life.everything i do,everything i ask,everything i share with him and everthing i tell him,he'll definitely says things that bring me down in life.i usually jus laugh it off cuz i dun wanna get mad at his comments at all,tot i may not take it to heart,sometimes it jus linger in my mind..he doesnt even support me both mentally and physically..i feel sad sometimes..man!i'm being emo rite now.=( and he always disrespect me!he doesnt even treat me like a sister,i always feel like he treats me like a loser or a rubbish dump.urghh!wateva!i jus hates him sometimes.ever since after he gt into commando,he changed so much!more like a demon instead.he thinks that he's a commando,he can jus disrespect pple.AHHH!!its the first time i last said i hate him since primary school.urgh!he's nth!he's not gonna affect my life!why in the earth am i blogging wad he says abt me at all?!i'm so not gonna get affected by him!i noe wad i'm doing!its my life,i'm gonna take full control of it and i cant because of wad he says,turn me into someone that is useless and a total loser!NO WAY!FUCKKK!!!i dun wanna talk abt this matter anymore!
i'm gonna try my best to do things at my best!no matter how high is the hurdle,i'll jus keep trying to prepare myself and jump over.i must no matter wad!jump over the stupid hurdle.
haah!this post is a long and random 1.anw i signed up for netball,touch rugby,nyaa,sprint kayak and shittt!i din sign up for db!urghh!but i might just go for the trial anw!maybe luh!haha!i planned on netball and sprint kayak!but shitt!their trg days clashes,both falls on monday!SHITT!