my brain is dead

I think im having brain dead soon. All i want to do is relax and nothing else. That is bad because when i was younger, i am much driven and motivated. But as you start to grown, when you do not get the right mentor or right guidance, you lost your path and you lost your motivations. My brother is totally right, nursing are people who are stupid, only stupid people will work in such industry. The day i chose my path as a nurse, im totally screwed, my brain is totally dead. the people i met are different now. ive changed to someone very laid back. very very! Which i do not like. i do not like nursing. But also, nursing is a very good place to train up my working skills with people. i get to see all sorts of people and how they come up with shit excuses to get away with their work not done. Excuses many, that is something they are good at. i do not want my brain to die so early. im only 21. Whenever i do things fast, they stop and slow me down. Now my pace is so slow but sometimes i do tend to go fast but they slowed me down again. sigh. i want to know my sister's point of view so i can climb the ladder faster. im not being on track with my objective. im not stress anymore. Which is bad. i hate that. im no longer stress and it sucked! it means the motivation drive is gone. im nothing now. sucks ! im lost! oh lord, please help me!